North Korea's Luxury Water Park Opens, Still Waiting For The Ski Resort

North Korea (DPRK) is piss poor. Outside of the capital Pyonyang the people are starving. They have a zillion people holed up in labor/prison camps all over the country, and Kim Jong-un is building luxury ski resorts and water parks, for tourists and the privileged class.

The ski resort, meant to show the world that the DPRK is "civilized" was slated to open on October 10th, it did not, which means some comrades have probably landed themselves- along with their entire family- in one of those labor camps.  Apparently when the current 'dear leader' was a young lad studying in Switzerland (under an alias), he became enamored of skiing, so now he wants one for himself. Located about a 4 hour ride from Pyonyang, in the Masik Pass, resort plans include two hotels, chalets, ski runs and lifts and some fun sleigh rides.

What did just manage to open is the humongous, luxurious Munsu Water Park, and they're all mighty proud of it. There are even a few foreign diplomats in attendance. Check out the perfectly orchestrated opening ceremony video here, including matching swim suits. Most look like they're having so much fun. It's got everything you could want including a gym, so all those uber-skinny, hungry people can bulk up a bit.

What a creepy place. One of the last places I would visit as long as the Kim-god dynasty is in control.

Kim-Jong-un To Take Weekends Off From Sabre Rattling- Andy Borowitz April Fools' Day Prank

Here's another April Fools' prank, although considering the main player it could go either way. This looks like it could have been posted on The Onion. I haven't seen any references to it being a joke post anywhere, but it's obvious it is:

Citing the Korean Central News Agency (KCNA)- the official mouthpiece of the DPRK- the New Yorker's Andy Borowitz says the Supreme Leader Kim Jong-un will only threaten the world Monday through Friday, and will rest on the weekends, because all that "sabre rattling" is exhausting. Jong-un further explained his decision:

“Dad always told me that you have to pace yourself in this job. The biggest danger isn’t the United States—it’s burnout.”

Kim said that he made his decision over the past weekend, after he issued his forty-ninth official statement threatening to engulf the mainland U.S. in a nuclear Armageddon: “I was in the middle of saying ‘infernal sea of fire,’ and I kind of realized, hey, I’m just phoning it in. And I never want to be that guy.”

By resting his violent rhetoric on weekends, Kim said, “On Monday through Friday I’ll have the insanity and unmitigated rage necessary to do this job right.”

Referring to his streak of three hundred and fifty-two consecutive days in which he threatened to destroy the world, Kim said, “I’m proud of it, sure. But nothing lasts forever.”

Kim began the month of April with a fresh round of threats, announcing today that North Korea had blocked South Korea on Pinterest.

Good one Andy.

Time Person of The Year- Obama- Again?

Time had a slew of worthy contenders for the 2012 Person of The Year and they chose Barack Obama, again?  Why?  Not that being named Person of the Year is necessarily an indication of the goodness or greatness achieved by that individual, after all there have been many unsavory characters that have won including Adolf Hitler in 1939, Josef Stalin in 1939 and 1942, and Ayatollah Khomeini in 1979. Not that I'm comparing Obama to Hitler, let's get that straight. Time Magazine's criteria has more to do with who most influenced the news of the year, good or bad.

I was rooting for Malala Yousafzai, the young Pakistani girl who was shot and left for dead by the Taliban for fighting for education rights for women, who some are trying to get nominated for a Nobel Peace Prize. She was runner up, but what an impact that would have made on all those who are trying so hard to keep women from getting an education had she won.  What did Obama do to merit it this time around? Good or bad? 

Time gave readers the chance to vote for their favorite influencer of the year (and I could have sworn I posted about that, but  can't seem to find it on my blog now), and North Korea's new 'dear leader' Kim Jong Un came out on top with the most votes, followed by, of all people, Jon Stewart. Here are the results of the poll, if you care to see who was nominated and how each one fared.