Hugo Chavez Plans a "Guerilla Army" Against US Imperialist Invasion

Delusional Hugo Chavez has always had it in his head that the evil imperialist US Empire is planning an invasion of Venezuela- as if we have the resources, the means or the desire to take over his failing country. But he's convinced, and so the secret "Plan Sucre" was born, at least according to opposition Parliamentary Rep Maria Corina Machado of the centre right Justice First party who told El Universal news that,

"Plan Sucre" – apparently crafted with input from close ally and fellow US foe Cuba – covers the legal, logistical and other angles necessary to "transform a professional army into a guerrilla army."

Machado also believes that the Chavez government plans on involving the Venezuelan people in that guerilla war. Machado, who had an unsuccessful presidential bid, wrote a letter to the Defense Committee of the National Assembly, warning Venezuelans and members of the National Armed Forces (FAN),

"..of the contents of a secret document that will change our lives, and turn us all into defenders of the revolution, thwarting what is established in the Constitution. We will cease being citizens to become combatants."

She then goes onto say that the plan's strategic objective is apparently

"...to build a new Bolivarian military doctrine in order to successfully wage a protracted people's war" in response to "a supposition of war by the Empire against the Bolivarian Republic of Venezuela".

The "Empire" being the U.S. Machado goes on to explain that:

"the protracted popular war, in its basic concept, means maintaining the people's support and drawing the enemy to the interior of the country, where the population can bleed them...."

The plan also "favors the employment of the Territorial Militia over members of FAN," and the government intends on recruiting a million militia by 2013 and two million by 2019.

Machado added that by reducing homeland defense to deal with one single external enemy and one single threat, the government will make Venezuela unacceptably vulnerable, and that the whole plan smacks of Cuba. Apparently, it's very similar to that of the Revolutionary Armed Forces of Cuba.

Hugo's paranoiac fear of Yanqui imperialism might be one factor in his desire to increase a guerilla army, but let's face it, he wants to further strengthen his own personal militia corps- which is basically what his current "army of the public" is, since they report to him directly- because with a million to two million strong he can pretty much ensure his presidency for life. That is, if the cancer doesn't get him.

Sources: Notitarde

Hugo Chavez Thinks The U.S. Gave Him and Other Lefty Latin Leaders Cancer

The always laughable Hugo Chavez, has come out with another doozy. This time, the loco Venezuelan President said he thinks that the U.S. might have given him, along with several other lefty Latin leaders, the big "C".  Yes, somehow the U.S. spread some cancer-inducing mojo their way, and voila.  Apparently, these thoughts came to him after he heard Argentina's President Cristina Fernandez de Kirchner has thyroid cancer.

“It’s very difficult to explain, even with the law of probabilities, what has been happening to some of us in Latin America,” Chavez said in a nationally televised speech to the military. “Would it be so strange that they’ve invented technology to spread cancer and we won’t know about it for 50 years?”

Now he wants a powwow with others who have had cancer, to compare notes. That would include Fernando Lugo (Paraguay) and Luiz Inacio Da Silva and Dilma Rousseff of Brazil. He also told other lefties to watch their backs:

“I’m just sharing my thoughts, but it’s very, very, very strange,” Chavez said. “Evo take care of yourself, Correa, be careful, we just don’t know,” he said, referring to Evo Morales and Rafael Correa, the leaders of Bolivia and Ecuador.

He also shared some advice that his commie buddy Fidel Castro gave him:

“Fidel always tells me, ‘Chavez be careful, they’ve developed technology, be careful with what you eat, they could stick you with a small needle,’” the Venezuelan leader said today. “In any case, I’m not accusing anyone, I’m just using my freedoms to reflect and issue comments on very strange events that are hard to explain.”

But Chavez has always been uber-paranoid and bizarre. He's convinced the U.S. is planning on invading Venezuela, although he shares those delusional beliefs with many others.  An article posted on Venezuelanalysis.com back in 2007 claimed that an invasion of Venezuela was imminent. Let's see-  it's been 4 years hence, and nada. In 2009, there was another article on this blog talking about a planned invasion by the U.S. through Colombia, and 2 years later- nada. Then in 2010 on the blog 'Postcards From The Revolution', award winning journalist Eva Golinger who is currently residing in what she terms "a country with a vibrant democracy and the largest oil reserves in the world"  [that would be Venezuela she's referring to] also talks about that invasion. I'm still waiting. But what's even more stupefying is that seemingly intelligent people actually buy into what he says.  Just take a look at the comments on Eva's blog and you'll see what I mean.  Pretty darn strange.

But I still think that the most laugh-inducing Chavez comment was when he claimed that capitalism killed the Martians.

I think I might actually miss him when he's gone.